Home Alone in North Carolina


Published:

Jeana Lamb* would love to know exactly what both her sons are doing after school while she's at work — but she has to settle for a little less.

Two years ago, the single mother enrolled her younger son, now 8 years old, in a YMCA after-school program at a 40 percent discount. Even with financial assistance, she can only afford to send one of her boys. Her oldest, now 12, has been staying by himself at home since he was 10.

"He calls me when he arrives home every day, and we talk during his time home alone constantly," the Huntersville mom says. "I would love to be able to afford both kids in after-school just so they could both benefit from the social interaction."

Working mom Lisa Foster knows that her two daughters enjoy the social aspects of Charlotte-Mecklenburg School's (CMS) Afterschool Enrichment Program (ASEP). But Foster's primary goal isn't socialization, it's supervision.

"One of the biggest advantages is that I know where my children are each and every day after school," she says. She also likes that her daughters, both in elementary school, get their homework done daily and have time for study or review before she picks them up at 6 p.m. And she's vocal about the curriculum: musicals, programs and special projects and field trips on teacher workday.

"For the peace of mind I receive, it is well worth every penny we spend," she says.

Lamb and Foster are working moms. Their situations are very different, but they both want the best for their children.

Benefits of after-school programs

According to POST statistics, children spend 50 percent more time out of school than in school. This includes the hours before and after school, school holidays and summer vacation. Large chunks of time like these are important when it comes to child development. And parents count on after-school and holiday programming to help their children grow and mature.

Advocates for after-school programs point to the many benefits of private, nonprofit and public programs throughout the state. Students enrolled in these programs typically get help with homework, participate in sports and other physical activities, prepare for tests, work on school projects and make new friends. In the Young Scholars survey, 69 percent of parents indicated that they believe such programs improve school attendance and reduce dropout rates.

"My daughter has been able to participate in Chess Club, Children's Theatre and other after-school activities on-site," says Greg Vacek, a Charlotte father of a Metrolina Regional Scholars Academy student. "She has been able to exercise and play with friends outside where she probably would watch TV at home."

Program options are limited

The problem is, according to 2005 survey information, North Carolina is "flunking" when it comes to afterschool programming. Results released in the summer of 2005 from the Young Scholars Afterschool Survey of North Carolina's Working Parents indicate that 91 percent of the state's working parents believe after-school programs are "absolute necessities." Yet more than one-third gave the state a failing grade when it comes to expanding after-school care.

That means parents like Lamb and Foster — and many of Carolina Parent's readers — don't have nearly as many options as they should. Only 14 percent of all children in North Carolina are in after-school programs. And almost a third of children from working families are completely unsupervised in the afternoons. Of those, it's estimated that 30 percent are "latchkey kids," children who have keys to their homes and are often alone at home after school because their parents are at work.

"There are just so many latchkey children out there," worries Claire Tate, director of Partners in Out-of-School Time (POST). "Parents are doing the very best they can. We have 5,000 on waiting lists for child-care subsidies in Mecklenburg County alone."

Many programs are expensive

A number of program directors say that expense, transportation difficulties and restricted hours of operation keep many parents from enrolling their children in after-school programs. Middle- and low-income parents and those in rural communities experience the greatest difficulty

"It's expensive! That's where the problem lies," says Tate, who estimates the average cost for a school-age child for after-school care to be $4,000 annually. She says the answer is to invest more public dollars into after-school and school programs.

Monnie Griggs, the extended learning coordinator of Durham Public Schools agrees. "The reason more families do not take advantage of afterschool programs is due to financial restraints," she says. "Most organizations that operate after-school programs are either nonprofit or self-supporting departments. Our department operates solely on parent fees and grants. There are limited resources that would allow these agencies to operate non-fee programs for families."

Affordable solutions

The YMCA is the largest provider of after-school care in the country. In Charlotte, it ranks as the second largest provider of after-school care during the year. (CMS's program is the largest).

"The Y provides financial assistance and is able to serve middle-income families who don't qualify for public assistance," says Jennifer Durkin of the YMCA of Greater Charlotte, who noted that after-school teen programs are also offered and transportation is available from most schools.

A number of parents across the state rely on a variety of after-school programs within public and private school systems. CMS's ASEP program currently serves 6,000 students at 87 elementary schools, four pre-K centers and 17 middle schools. The cost is $51 a week (or $204 per month) for the first child; $49 additional per week for a second child.

According to Leigh Bishop, assistant director for the program, parents can receive subsidy assistance through Child Care Resources or through the city. She thinks the real stumbling block for participation is often transportation, which is not provided at CMS.

"Families with younger siblings choose to have school-age students attend the day care so that their children are picked up at one location. Also, families that have older siblings probably allow children to ride the bus home and are cared for by an older sibling," Bishop says.

In Durham Public Schools, before- and/or after-school programs operate in all 28 elementary schools, all nine middle schools and one high school. Fourteen percent of elementary school students participate in afterschool programming. The cost per month for non-grant funded elementary programs is $135 for after school and $45 before school.

In Orange County, the cost is $35 per week (or $140 per month) for one student in its after-school program. Seventeen percent of elementary school students participate, and 35 percent of middle school students attend in a unique program for ages 11 to 14.

All elementary schools and some middle schools in Winston-Salem/Forsyth County Schools offer before-school care, after-school care or both. Fees are charged, but scholarships are available for students who demonstrate financial need.

Guilford County Public School's after-school program for grades K-5 costs $35 per week and features a regular study hall. Other parents of school children often turn to private child-care options such as day-care centers or after-school baby sitters, which range in cost from $5 to $10 an hour, often pricier than nonprofit programs, church day cares or care provided by extended family members.

Perhaps the least expensive alternative is allowing children to stay home alone with no supervision. The cost: as little as it costs to make a duplicate house key. Or is the cost really much greater?

Legions of latchkey kids

Lamb defends her decision to allow her oldest stay home alone: "The age of a child plays a factor in determining when they are ready to be alone, but I think their maturity level and their own confidence and security with being home alone is also important. I know that he's fine."

Gail Angle of Durham Social Services says her office has minimum standards that child protective service social workers use as a guide to determine if a child can safely be left alone.

"Children 5 and under are not to be left anywhere alone. They must be supervised by an adult by visual and auditory contact, especially when they are left outside," she explains. "Children from 6 to 8 years of age are not to be left alone for more than a few minutes. Children 9 to 10 are not to be left alone for more than two hours, and children ages 11 to 12 are not left alone for more than four hours."

Parents aren't always aware of these guidelines, and even those who are can't always adhere to them. "We do run into this problem quite often and, for the most part, people just can't afford after-school programs and summer camp programs," Angle says.

Home alone too much, too soon

Rosa Andrews, who works with NC State 4-H, a program that provides support for 4-H after-school care providers, worries that financial constraints are leading parents to make decisions that aren't in their children's best interests

"I would suspect that children are being left alone that are too young to be alone. We hear sad stories all the time of latchkey children harmed when alone," she says.

According to recent statistics, juvenile violence and crime rates are four times greater during after-school hours, and youth are 37 percent more likely to become teen parents if they are not involved in after-school activities. Furthermore, young people home alone for long stretches of time are at great risk of multiple social problems.

"Latchkey does have a negative connotation. Kids are exposed to garbage TV, household accidents, violent video games, as well as early experimentation in sex and drugs," says Tate, who also worries about what kids are missing out on. "Arts, sports, literacy, social and emotional skills. You don't get that sitting at home alone.

Kids aren't the only ones who suffer

North Carolina's lack of affordable and accessible after-school programs may be affecting the economy, as well. According to the Young Scholars Survey of North Carolina's Working Parents, absenteeism and decreased productivity stemming directly from parents' needs to provide after-school child care cost businesses between $500 and $2,000 per employee annually. More than half of the working parents surveyed have taken time off from work to care for their kids or transport them after school.

"When working parents worry about their children, business dollars walk out the door," says Gail Daughtry, executive director of the program.

Although state officials and child development experts set forth guidelines about when children can be left alone safely, most agree that there is, in fact, no magic number or age. Instead, parents must weigh their options carefully, often making hard choices based on maturity levels, safety concerns, financial obligations and transportation issues.

According to the Afterschool Alliance, a national public awareness and advocacy group, these choices would be far easier if parents had more numerous and more affordable options from which to choose — public, private, low-cost and free. The organization's goal is to secure accessible afterschool programming for all children by the year 2010. And that's a goal every parent can support.

* Name changed to protect privacy.

Note: This article was written in 2005.

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Calendar

December 2019

Wear your favorite holiday attire and dine with Santa Claus. Enjoy a delicious brunch, stories and crafts, and take pictures with the jolly man from the North Pole. 

Cost: $10/child. Free for ages 2 and younger

Where:
Joyner Park Community Center
701 Harris Rd.
Wake Forest, NC  27587
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Participants develop their naturalist skills and understanding of local nature. Ages 5-8 with parent. Register online. 

Cost: $8/resident, $10/nonresident

Where:
Stevens Nature Center/Hemlock Bluffs
2616 Kildaire Farm Rd.
Cary, NC
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Telephone: 919-387-5980
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Girls ages 5-12 take their favorite doll and have a creative time together preparing for the holidays. Register by emailing llpolkhouse2@gmail.com.

Cost: $22/attendee, $20/sister

Where:
Historic Polk House
537 N. Blount St.
Raleigh, NC  27604
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Telephone: 919-676-6368
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See dancers and a guitarist from Flamenco Carolina perform a Spanish style of music and dance.

Cost: $3/person

Where:
Century Center
100 N. Greensboro St.
Carrboro, NC  27510
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Ebeneezer Scrooge was visited by three spirits, but what about the next Christmas? With heartwarming excitement, discover how the Cratchit family has fared in the year that has passed since old...

Cost: Free

Where:
Wake Forest Renaissance Centre
405 S. Brooks St.
Wake Forest, NC  27587
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The Durham Medical Orchestra performs with special guest Joseph Alessi, principal trombone, New York Philharmonic.

Cost: Free

Where:
Baldwin Auditorium, Duke University
1336 Campus Dr.
Durham, NC  27705
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As a Christmas gift to our community and surrounding area, Wake Forest Presbyterian Church delivers the true Christmas story in a stirring virtual “walk” through Bethlehem to the stable...

Cost: Free

Where:
Wake Forest Presbyterian Church
12605 Capital Blvd
Wake Forest, NC  27587
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Sponsor: Wake Forest Presbyterian Church
Telephone: 919-556-7777
Contact Name: Meghan Reynolds
Website »

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Fun for the entire family, enjoy this wonderful, witty retelling of a classic fairy-tale. With a score consisting of well-known pop songs, follow Snow White and her Seven Dwarves as they try to...

Cost: $10-$60/person

Where:
Duke Energy Center for the Performing Arts
2 East South Street
Raleigh, NC  27601
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Sponsor: Duke Energy Center for the Performing Arts
Telephone: 919-996-8700
Contact Name: Blake Jones
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The choir presents its 49th performance on Handel's "Messiah."

Cost: Free

Where:
White Plains United Methodist Church
313 S.E. Maynard Rd.
Cary, NC  27513
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Website »

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The first day of winter is right around the corner! Help us welcome the season by making a snow globe to take home. We will bring the materials if you bring the imagination! For all ages (adult...

Cost: For all ages (adult accompaniment required for all children); FREE. Registration

Where:
Crowder County Park
4709 Ten-Ten Rd
Apex, NC  27529
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Telephone: 919-662-2850

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Children will enjoy this wonderful book written by John Denver reminding us not to forget about the wildlife this holiday season. We will make a craft then take a walk to look for our wildlife...

Cost: Free

Where:
Harris Lake County Park
2112 County Park Dr.
New Hill, NC  27562
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Sponsor: Harris Lake County Park
Telephone: 919-387-4342
Contact Name: Joanne St. Clair
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Join RTOOT as it performs the music of great Italian composers as well as beloved Christmas classics. Purchase tickets online. 

Cost: $9/adult, $3 ages 12 and younger

Where:
Cary Arts Center
101 Dry Ave.
Cary, NC  27511
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Dan the Animal Man brings some of his animals from his vast collection to entertain all ages. 

Cost: $3/person

Where:
Century Center
100 N. Greensboro St.
Carrboro, NC  27510
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Help find candy canes hidden in Bond Park before the Grinch turns them green. Ages 6-12. Registration required online. Choose course #127871. 

Cost: $10/child

Where:
Bond Park
801 High House Rd.
Cary, NC
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Embark on a wild ride with favorite Disney characters Mickey, Minnie, Goofy and many others in this fun-filled getaway featuring unexpected hijinks and character interaction. Purchase tickets...

Cost: $15 and up

Where:
PNC Arena
1400 Edwards Mill Rd.
Raleigh, NC  27607
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Website »

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Ages 1-5 and caregiver delight in the discoveries of nature. Register online. 

Cost: $8/resident, $10/nonresident

Where:
Stevens Nature Center/Hemlock Bluffs
2616 Kildaire Farm Rd.
Cary, NC
View map »


Telephone: 919-387-5980
Website »

More information

Get into the holiday spirit by decorating cooking, making a craft and enjoying a holiday children's show.

Cost: Free

Where:
Century Center
100 N. Greensboro St.
Carrboro, NC  27510
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Website »

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The Wake Forest Abilities Choir will present an evening of holiday music under the direction of director.

Cost: Free

Where:
Wake Forest Renaissance Centre
405 S. Brooks St.
Wake Forest, NC  27587
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Website »

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Embark on a wild ride with favorite Disney characters Mickey, Minnie, Goofy and many others in this fun-filled getaway featuring unexpected hijinks and character interaction. Purchase tickets...

Cost: $15 and up

Where:
PNC Arena
1400 Edwards Mill Rd.
Raleigh, NC  27607
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Website »

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Celebrate pecans at the State Farmers Market.

Cost: Free

Where:
State Farmers Market
1201 Agriculture St.
Raleigh, NC  27603
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Join us to learn about how Habitat for Humanity helps build houses, hear a Christmas tale and then build a graham cracker house of your own. Call to, 919-245-2532. Best for ages 4 and up with a...

Cost: free

Where:
Orange County Main Library
137 W Margaret Ln
Hillsborough, NC  27278
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Sponsor: Orange County Public Library
Telephone: 919-245-2539
Contact Name: Libbie Hough
Website »

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Is there a man in the moon, and is the moon made of cheese? Sip on some hot cocoa and listen to some of the stories people have told about the moon and find out if there is truth to them. Then...

Cost: For all ages; FREE. Registration is required for everyone, and adult accompanime

Where:
Crowder County Park
4709 Ten-Ten Rd
Apex, NC  27529
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Telephone: 919-662-2850
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Discover family traditions from North Carolina and around the globe. Create art, enjoy free access to Frida Kahlo, Diego Rivera, and Mexican Modernism, and have a special visit with Santa.

Cost: Free

Where:
North Carolina Museum of Art East Building and Museum Plaza
Raleigh, NC


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Bundle up and enjoy an evening around the campfire learning about creatures of the night and listen to Native American tales about some of our favorite nocturnal animals. Roast marshmallows and go...

Cost: Free

Where:
Harris Lake County Park
2112 County Park Dr.
New Hill, NC  27562
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Sponsor: Harris Lake County Park
Telephone: 919-387-4342
Contact Name: Joanne St. Clair
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Kids ages 5-12 enjoy indoor activities while parents enjoy a night out. Register online. 

Cost: $30/resident, $45/nonresident

Where:
Halle Cultural Arts Center
237 N. Salem St.
Apex, NC  27502
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Wear white clothing and play games, tumble and dance. Enjoy pizza, drinks and more. Ages 5-10. Registration required online. Choose course #127487.

Cost: $18/child; $28 for two children per family

Where:
Middle Creek Community Center
125 Middle Creek Ave.
Apex, NC  27539
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Friday, December 13, 6:00pm, at both the Millbrook and Wake Forest Campuses. Put on your Christmas jammies, grab a blanket and come out for a  festive night to watch the classic animated...

Cost: Free

Where:
Crossroads Fellowship
2721 E Millbrook Road
Raleigh, NC  27604
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Sponsor: Crossroads Fellowship
Telephone: 919-981-0222
Contact Name: Lorraine Entwisle
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Have some fun and make something great at the Clay studio (and parents can sneak away and grab a bite or do some shopping at Northgate Mall). Each kid will complete and paint a piece of pottery...

Cost: $18 per child per workshop

Where:
1058 West Club Blvd
Durham, NC  27701
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Telephone: 919-560-2726
Contact Name: Lauren Tannenbaum
Website »

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Embark on a wild ride with favorite Disney characters Mickey, Minnie, Goofy and many others in this fun-filled getaway featuring unexpected hijinks and character interaction. Purchase tickets...

Cost: $15 and up

Where:
PNC Arena
1400 Edwards Mill Rd.
Raleigh, NC  27607
View map »


Website »

More information

Sing along with the band as they perform holiday favorites of Christmas, Hanukkah, the winter solstice and more. 

Cost: Free

Where:
Cary Senior Center
120 Maury O'Dell Place
, NC  27513
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Celebrate the love and joy that this season brings by creating art inspired by a Christmas tree. Register online. Choose course #126761.

Cost: $32/resident, $42/nonresident

Where:
Cary Arts Center
101 Dry Ave.
Cary, NC  27511
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Website »

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Give rugby a try. Take part in tag rugby pick-up games every Saturday morning at Baileywick Road Park, near the Second Shelter.  No experience necessary. All ages. 

Cost: Free

Where:
Baileywick Road Park
9501 Baileywick Rd
Second Shelter Field
Raleigh, NC  27615
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Sponsor: Raleigh Redhawks Rugby
Contact Name: denise travis
Website »

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Our Reindeer Romp is open to the entire community and our Girls on the Run families. So join us! Celebrate as nearly 1,000 girls reach their end-of-season goals – the finish line is only the...

Cost: $30 - $35

Where:
Koka Booth Amphitheater
8003 Regency Pkwy
Cary, NC  27518
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Sponsor: Girls on the Run of the Triangle
Telephone: 919-401-6307
Contact Name: Jamie Botta
Website »

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Ages 5-12 make a picture frame for the holidays. Snack provided. Register online. 

Cost: $30/resident, $45/nonresident

Where:
Halle Cultural Arts Center
237 N. Salem St.
Apex, NC  27502
View map »


Website »

More information

Ages 1-5 and caregiver delight in the discoveries of nature. Register online. 

Cost: $8/resident, $10/nonresident

Where:
Stevens Nature Center/Hemlock Bluffs
2616 Kildaire Farm Rd.
Cary, NC
View map »


Telephone: 919-387-5980
Website »

More information

Travel with us to Puerto Rico with books, games and arts and crafts!  Join the staff of ISLA (Immersion for Spanish Language Acquisition) for a fun filled hour! Best for ages 3 and up with a...

Cost: Free Gratis

Where:
Orange County Main Library
137 W Margaret Ln
Hillsborough, NC  27278
View map »


Sponsor: Orange County Public Library
Telephone: 919-245-2539
Contact Name: Libbie Hough
Website »

More information

Embark on a wild ride with favorite Disney characters Mickey, Minnie, Goofy and many others in this fun-filled getaway featuring unexpected hijinks and character interaction. Purchase tickets...

Cost: $15 and up

Where:
PNC Arena
1400 Edwards Mill Rd.
Raleigh, NC  27607
View map »


Website »

More information

One ticket admits the entire family to decorate a special gingerbread house. Supplies provided. Workshops available at 2 p.m. and 4:30 p.m. Allergy-free workshop available at 11 a.m....

Cost: $40

Where:
Family Preschool
4907 Garrett Rd
Durham, NC  27707
View map »


Sponsor: Family Preschool
Telephone: 919-402-1500
Contact Name: Sue Henson
Website »

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Family Wildlife Series: Holiday Habitat Helpers Saturday, December 14, 2-3 Attract winter wildlife to your backyard by providing or improving their habitat.  Create simple outdoor decorations...

Cost: Free

Where:
Blue Jay Point County Park
3200 Pleasant Union Church Rd
Raleigh, NC  27614
View map »


Website »

More information

Embark on a wild ride with favorite Disney characters Mickey, Minnie, Goofy and many others in this fun-filled getaway featuring unexpected hijinks and character interaction. Purchase tickets...

Cost: $15 and up

Where:
PNC Arena
1400 Edwards Mill Rd.
Raleigh, NC  27607
View map »


Website »

More information

Embark on a wild ride with favorite Disney characters Mickey, Minnie, Goofy and many others in this fun-filled getaway featuring unexpected hijinks and character interaction. Purchase tickets...

Cost: $15 and up

Where:
PNC Arena
1400 Edwards Mill Rd.
Raleigh, NC  27607
View map »


Website »

More information

Join us as we watch for meteors during the Gemenids Meteor Shower. Local astronomers will help us observe these shooting stars and other phenomena in the night sky. As a bonus we may see or hear...

Cost: Free

Where:
American Tobacco Trail
1309 New Hill-Olive Chapel Rd.
Apex, NC  27502
View map »


Sponsor: Harris Lake County Park and the American Tobacco Trail
Telephone: 919-387-4342
Contact Name: Joanne St. Clair
Website »

More information

Favorite Christmas songs are presented in authentic Nashville country style with dazzling guitars and fiddles along with soaring harmonies. Purchase tickets online. 

Cost: $25/person

Where:
Wake Forest Renaissance Centre
405 S. Brooks St.
Wake Forest, NC  27587
View map »


Website »

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See the choir perform beloved Christmas songs with guest vocal group AVANTE. Purchase tickets online. 

Cost: See website for fees

Where:
Cary Arts Center
101 Dry Ave.
Cary, NC  27511
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Website »

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